Wow that was tough… I just returned from a job interview and I feel kind of beaten up. I had to teach an observed lesson, complete a marking sample exercise and was interviewed twice by senior management. It’s only right that they screen thoroughly, given the quality of the school involved, but all the effort can seem slightly soul-destroying given that there were 7 candidates selected for interview – meaning a huge amount of time and effort given for a 14%ish chance of success.


How did it go? Well, my lesson went pretty badly, my interviews well. That should be the end of that really – 7 candidates selected from 60 applications should leave little room for anyone messing up the lesson part and retaining any semblance of hope. However, being honest, I think I’ll at least be considered. Call me over-optimistic, but I don’t believe they’d have worked me quite so long or hard if they’d already written me off!


And so what? This isn’t meant to be my diary, after all. Well no, it’s meant to be charting my difficulties and challenges in living as a Christian, and that makes all this very relevant. I want this job a lot, after all, and am I willing to retain my trust in God, to thank Him for His good plans, if I don’t get the gig?? Am I willing to retain a sense of joy if I continue into a 6th, or a 7th year in my current role, bored, listless, unchallenged and with little hope of promotion given the permanence of those occupying all senior roles? Am I willing not to bemoan myself and my lot if, for the third time in the past year, I give my all to a day of interview and get told no, I haven’t sufficiently impressed?


It IS tough and these thoughts must be vastly amplified when being asked by someone who has actually lost their job – someone who is applying for work from a position of desperation, beset by fear that mortgage payments can’t be met. In these Credit Crunch times, are we each willing to place our faith in God’s sovereign will? Are we still able to state with firm certainty that He knows best? That will be my challenge if the phone call does bear bad news this evening. However, it would REALLY be my challenge if the film industry gets to a stage where PR is deemed unnecessary and my wife was thus next to lose her job. Then we wouldn’t be able to pay the mortgage, keep the house, make debt repayments etc… Being honest, it feels like it would be the end of the world!


But it wouldn’t be the end. All over the world, Christians live and witness in the midst of collapsed economies, in grinding poverty, fixing their eyes on the next world, not this one. We are saved through grace, and nothing compares to that gift or the price paid to give it. My breathless fears are based on the idolatrous faith I place in my lifestyle, my social standing, my career, my comfort, my desire for CONTROL… We can’t abide anything – be it the collapse of financial markets, or the snow that has shut down my school for half of this week – that reminds us of how powerless we actually are.


So yes I will endeavour to keep trusting in God’s sovereign control; I will put my faith in the creator, not in what’s created. I will thank Him even if I don’t get this or any other job any time soon… Who else am I going to trust instead, after all? Certainly not myself, after the mess I made of today!

PS Nope – didn’t get the job…


1 comment so far

  1. Colin Hall on

    Sorry you didn’t get it dude! I too suffer with the same boredom and lack of promotion at work and am thinking of moving on, but times seem to be a bit rubbish for finding new employment and freelance is so uncertain. I’m starting to feel a bit lost in it all. Thanks for your blog, it’s good to be reminded of God’s sovereign control and the things that are certain in this life till the next.

    Still, I wish he would shout from heaven what he wants me to do. Though, he probably is and I’m just not listening.

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