Hello again – hope you enjoyed your weekend! I am proud now to introduce our first female contributor – Lynda – who has daily dealings with ‘the world’ by virtue of her trendy media job. It’s a piece expressing considerable frustration, much of which should give us blokes pause for thought. Feel free to comment – particularly any girls who might agree!

Many of you know who I am, as I stupidly volunteered to do this and am the only one of us guest bloggers who regularly wears dresses. Despite this, I’m still going to be totally honest. Buckle up… 

At this moment in time, the word that currently sums up my experience of living in the world as a woman for God is guilt.  Guilt that I still do, think and say things, that after 12 years of Christianity, I shouldn’t.  Guilt that my ambition of being a godly woman, who can serve her church and younger sisters well, doesn’t really seem to be happening. 

I’m aware that guilt is not just a female thing, plus I don’t want this blog to be horrendously self-indulgent as I’m aware it could be. However I do believe that the struggle for perfection, the desire to please and the need to be loved and accepted by all is something that affects us girls possibly more than the boys.  

So, I have these words by J. I Packer on my fridge as a daily reminder of the unconditional love and forgiveness that Jesus brings: 

“There is tremendous relief in knowing that His love to me is utterly realistic, based at every point on prior knowledge of the worst about me, so that no discovery now can disillusion Him about me, in the way I am often disillusioned about myself, and quench His determination to bless me.” (Knowing God, p. 37) 

Despite my best efforts though, guilt still has a hold over me in many areas. These are my top two. (cue Top of The Pops music…) 

Work: I’ve been blessed with an amazing job and when I started 5 years ago, I passionately knew I was there to proclaim Jesus and do His work. I relied on him for each new contract and praised His name every time I walked through the gates. However, now my job is safer and my career is taking off, the reliance on Him is less. Add to that the bad decisions I’ve made, the wrong things I say each day and how I’ve behaved at wrap parties, I sometimes fear my reputation is beyond redemption. How on earth could God use such a sinner as me, how dare I let Him down so badly.  

And, as you expected, relationships: I never used to doubt that God was faithful and would provide for my every need. And I still believe that, yet it’s getting harder. As a single girl in her mid-twenties, my ‘student’ years feel over and now everything should start to fall in to place. The house, the husband, the children. But, so far they haven’t and the temptation to figure it out without God has led to wrong decisions and heartbreak. Not to mention a complete lack of glory to Him. As a girl, the emotions and the heart speak much louder than the head and the intellect. We are crying out for the good shepherd to guide and comfort us.   

So, living in the world as a godly Christian woman? Currently I suggest you’d ask someone else. But, I am blessed with some brilliant Christian girlfriends who know my struggles well and as such know when to speak, what to pray and how to tell me off.  I know some fantastic Christian men who give me an entirely different perspective on each and every dilemma. And, Jesus has called me and set me apart, and the work that He has started in me will be brought to fruition. Eventually. 


2 comments so far

  1. Debbie on

    THANKS for such an honest article, Lynda! (sorry Andy but I’m stuck at home today so I find myself reading your blog again..)

    Great quote from Packer about the freedom we have in Christ. Two thoughts:

    1. Yes women in our world are tempted to be ‘pleasers’
    in an unhealthy way, which we can surely see the origins of in Gen 3 – the Fall. But although the image of God was marred in women and men, it was not destroyed! In Christ sin is conquered and a new freedom possible. So we can be redeemed from that development of a dominant-submissive relationship that was so foreign to what God intended in creation.
    2. Marriage is great! – but marriage and motherhood are not every Christian woman’s true vocation – and single wo/men shouldn’t be seen as unfulfilled and unsuccessful – although that may be society’s view.
    3.sorry! but just have to add that we are ALL made in God’s image with qualities of rationality and emotion, and I just feel it’s really damaging to suggest that one gender as a whole has a monopoly of either!!

  2. Simon on

    This is a great post!

    Guilt is a terrible enemy for Christians. I think all of us at times in the past have been stopped by guilt making us think we’re not good enough… we’re not what God wants. But “sinners” make the best christians – cos they know forgiveness and what that means. Those who have been forgiven much, love much.
    Another big thing I’ve been thinking about this week is how God’s love for us really is unconditional. A baby is born and is loved so much by both parents, even though it hasn’t done anything… it’s quite selfish really.. just sits and eats and sleeps and poops. But the parents love it so much, just for being born.. just for being.
    God’s called a father for a reason. That’s how he feels about us. We haven’t done owt to deserve that love. In fact, we’ve abused it, taken advantage of it, taken it for granted in every selfish decision. But that doesn’t change his love for us. We’re his children and he loves us exactly as he always did. He is endlessly patient and kind and shows that to us every day.

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